Gravity Will Turn Your Opinion of 3D Films Upside Down

‘Game-changer’ is a phrase I’ve never been a huge fan of. It feels contrived and forced at the best of times – and the fact that it’s been used to describe everything from video games to toilet paper lessens its effect somewhat. (Honestly, does new, super-absorbent Charmin really constitute a ‘game-changing’ revolution?) With that being said, however, if there was ever a movie that probably deserved such a title, it would be Gravity. The film will shift your perceptions of what FX-driven, 3D-cinema can do. Its tight, concise narrative drives the action forward relentlessly in one of the most intense movie-going experiences you’ll see this year – if not of all-time.

The minimalist story involves astronauts (George Clooney as the mission captain, Matt Kowalski and Sandra Bullock as specialist Ryan Stone) installing a new camera on the Hubble space telescope. After 5 minutes of breathtaking FX shots (Clooney’s Kowalski, remarking on his last spacewalk before retirement, intones, “You can’t beat the view.”) disaster strikes and the remaining 90 minutes are spent gripping your armrests and holding your breath.

I’m not a fan of 3D. I think it’s a gimmicky cash-grab that studios tack on in post when they want to artificially inflate a film’s box office by charging higher ticket prices. That being said, this film is the best argument anyone could ever make for the medium. You can’t help but feel like it must have felt back in the '70s when they saw Kubrick’s ‘2001’ for the first time. Or better still - when they saw Georges Melies’ ‘A Trip to the Moon’ way back in 1902. It feels downright revolutionary.

Never before has 3D been used so effectively to draw you into a film and help immerse you in the experience. Avatar *looked* cool, but it didn’t manage anything close to this. Using various POV and FX-shots, Alfonso Cuaron succeeds in making the audience part of the film – you’ll feel like you’re out there floating yourself. The dull, muted sound effects (because space) serve to add to the experience. There are times when the only sound you hear is breathing and the rapid thump-thump-thump of the character’s heart. Soon you’ll realize it’s not just their heart that’s pounding, either. It’s an incredible experience and it simply would not have been possible without the use of 3D.

Of course, for all the technical brilliance demonstrated, the movie would fall flat were it not for the rock-solid performances of the two leads. Though very little exposition is provided, they manage to craft characters we care for – and when you think that basically the entire movie is just the two of them in front of a green screen, that’s an incredible feat. Though Bullock’s Ryan Stone is unquestionably the star of the film, I found George Clooney’s performance managed to eclipse it as his all-American space hero, Captain Stanley Kowalski, could’ve easily fallen into simple caricature (like my esteemed friend noted, a live-action Buzz Lightyear), however he manages to keep him grounded, relatable and likable.

Director Alfonso Cuaron (who has previously filmed the incredible 2006 dystopian sci-fi gem, Children of Men, as well as the best Harry Potter movie, The Prisoner of Azkaban, among others) keeps the pace up and barely gives his viewers a chance to catch their breath. It’s a dizzying film, but given its subject matter, the breakneck pace suits it perfectly. It clocks in at just over an hour and a half and by the time it’s through you’ll need to take a moment to decompress before leaving the theater. The aforementioned CG-aided cinematography simply needs to be seen to be believed and he utilizes POV shots in an absorbing, engrossing manner.

Gravity is nothing short of a filmmaking triumph. It’s a mesmerizing spectacle. An utter joy to watch that serves as a master-class in pacing and shows that great science-fiction doesn’t have to take place in a galaxy far, far away. Its use of 3D will serve as the new standard-bearer for the industry and is one of the only movies I will ever recommend that you *must* see in that specific format. Better still, see it in IMAX. See it in 3D. Just see it. Space is a vacuum and this film will take your breath away.

Geek Score: 10 out of 10 Bacon Strips (Golden Bacon Award)

What I’m Playing: GTA V for X-Box 360

What I’m Reading: X-Files season 10 (IDW), Batman Zero Year (Scott Snyder)

Hands Off My Franchise!

Or: How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love Pop Culture

I'm not sure if I mentioned this before, but I'm something of a zombie afficionado. I've seen most of the great zombie films - and quite a few of the not-so-great ones, as well. I have a bookshelf that has two full shelves of zombie literature. Without a doubt, the crown jewel - the piece de resistance, if you will - would have to be Max Brooks' sprawling epic, World War Z: The Oral History of the Zombie War. It's fantastic. More than a simple zombie book, it takes a global scope and really shines a light on the human condition - how do we react during periods of unrest? The conceit is that the novel doesn't really have a main character - the narrator (Brooks himself, ostensibly) travels the globe, interviewing various people and recording their memories of the great zombie war, some ten years after humanity had 'won'. The result is a series of vignettes that piece together a sprawling epic that is, at times chilling, believable (especially by genre standards) and utterly human. The book is as much about humanity as it is about zombies and it's written with incredibly-intelligent prose.

I've read it cover-to-cover five times and every time I read it, I love it all the more. Forget zombie novels, it's my favourite novel, period. I'm something of a Patient Zero in that I have lent my copy out to five different people now and each person who has read it has been similarly amazed (two even bought their own copies).

So, suffice it to say, I'm a bit of a zealot.

When word first came out in 2009 that Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio's production companies were engaged in a bidding war over the rights to Brooks' novel I was both excited and terrified. I was excited because the idea of a big-budget, globe-trotting zombie epic would be the be-all, end-all, 'I can die a happy man' sort of once-in-a-lifetime (or so I thought at the time) deal. Simultaneously, I was terrified, because there was the very real potential of Hollywood fucking up this perfect, beautiful little thing that I loved so dearly.

Keep in mind, this was somewhat ahead of the curve in terms of zombies in mainstream culture. The Walking Dead wouldn't premiere on AMC until the following August (at which point the genre officially exploded - now we have zombies on TV, zombies in music, zombies that fall in love, etc.).

Eventually, Brad Pitt won the bidding war and early reviews of the first-draft of the script (as written by J. Michael Straczynski) were unanimously positive.

I was excited.

Then, word came out that they brought in another writer to change the script in a bid to make it more 'filmable' (which, in my opinion, was bad news because the book as it was essentially was 'unfilmable' (at least not in one movie), so this had to mean they were "Hollywooding" it up a bit).

I was terrified.

Then, MORE re-writes - this time, from Drew Goddard and Damon Lindelof (whom I loved from LOST and the Star Trek reboot - and at this point I hadn't yet experienced the disappointment that is Prometheus.)

I was excited.

Then came words of endless re-shoots, release delays and, finally, a trailer that showed ... *gasp* ... FAST zombies. ... Who are JUMPING. ... And creating a literal MOUNTAIN of writhing, CGI flesh that was trying to climb over the (extremely mild spoiler here) Israel defense perimeter. In short, the trailer made it appear that the film was everything that I feared it would become. A dumbed-down, over-simplified, Hollywood version of my favourite novel of all-time.

I was inconsolable. I ranted on Twitter. I cursed Brad Pitt's name. I even spat on my DVD copy of The Curious Life of Benjamin Button. (I don't actually own that movie)

Early reviews started sneaking out and they were, surprisingly, quite positive. I'm not going to say I was emboldened, but I began to take notice again. The reviews were quick to warn you that the connection to the source material was scant, at best, but the film was an enjoyable zombie epic. Given that I had decided to shut up and give Max Brooks my money (through residuals, anyway) the moment the movie deal was signed, my mind was set. I was *going* to see this movie.

I saw the film today and it was a perfectly serviceable - indeed, even enjoyable - zombie film. If it had been called 'Brad Pitt in "Global Zompocalypse"', I might have really loved it. But, alas, it was called World War Z, and I'm stuck here, two hours after the film, ranting on the internet about 'what might have been'.

But the purpose of this post isn't to post a ranty review on the many things they did wrong, or the numerous things they could have done differently to make the film more closely resemble the source material. What I'm trying to say here, in my own, convoluted way, is that geeks, as a general rule, are passionate people. We unabashedly *love* certain things - love talking about them, love sharing them with our friends, love debating-minutiae-until-we're-blue-in-the-face about them.

But we're also fiercely protective of these things we've come to love. I've long argued that the Hipster is an offshoot off the genus, 'Geekus Sapien'. Think about it - they love music and hideous clothes almost as much as we love zombies and sci-fi. They'll debate the merits of their favourite band with anyone who'll listen, ad nauseam. But what really connects us here is the need to brag about how long we've been 'into' things. Seriously, I know a few people who've actually said, "You think the TV show is good? I read Game of Thrones when I was in tenth grade!"

As for me? "I liked zombies before they were a thing. Now everybody's all about them. I bet they've never even read Wellington's Monster trilogy. Pfft."

Here's the thing, though - we're going to have to get used to this. Hollywood is going to stripmine our beloved franchises and turn them into bastardized, Hollywood versions of themselves as 'geek' is now bigger than ever. As ironic (see? hipster) as it sounds, all of a sudden we're cool. We run shit. We're a target market. The biggest show on TV is a drama about the aftermath of a zombie apocalypse. A-list stars are actually asking for roles in a new Star Wars film. Joss Whedon is the most sought-after director in Hollywood. Tyrion Lannister won an Emmy, for pete's sake (well deserved, too, I might add).

It's a brave new world, but we're going to have to get used to giving up control of these things that we hold so dear. It's scary, I know. I have a couple of friends who have the same sort of trepidation towards the new Ender's Game movie, starring Harrison Ford, that I had regarding World War Z. To them, I can only say, I feel your pain.

But the bottom line is this - even if Hollywood cocks it up, in no way should it change the way you felt in the first place. That comic book, series of novels, etc. is still just as incredible as it was the first time you read/watched/played it. Dig it out, devour it, savour it again, pass it off to a friend.

And then hit the internet and debate the hell out of how much better the book was than the movie.

What I'm Playing:The Last of Us on PS3

What I'm Reading:100 Bullets - vol. 13 (Azzarrello / Rizzo) (The end of a truly epic series. I can't wait)

X-Box 180

Title shamelessly stolen from every clever Kotaku commenter

So I was all set to review Before Midnight before finding out that Microsoft has flip-flopped on their decision to enforce DRM and allow used games on the XBone. As I mentioned in my previous post, I was one of the few *proponents* of the system in its (now-outdated) iteration, so I’m a little disappointed here.

In short, rather than the brave new digital realm – complete with sharing games with friends all over the world (which was the best part of the ‘old model’ of the X-Bone that Microsoft just could never manage to properly explain to the public at large – a case of their marketing machine failing them) we see a victory of the ‘old guard’ of video games. Digital downloads cannot be ‘shared’. The idea of a game library that travels where you do requires a really large suitcase instead of a simple internet connection. Discs will be required to be in the system tray in order to play. In essence, it’ll be ‘business as usual’.

While I suppose it’s admirable that Microsoft listened to their customers (who almost universally lambasted the old model – justifiably or not), ultimately I liken this to the old explorers who were told if they sailed too far, they’d fall off the edge of the Earth … only unlike those explorers, Microsoft actually listened, turned around and sailed back to port.

Sure, nobody died of scurvy, but we didn’t find a Northwest Passage, either, right?

What I’m Reading: Batman & Robin (Peter Tomasi), Green Lantern (Geoff Johns)

What I’m Playing: The Last of Us on PS3 (It is seriously *amazing*. Believe the hype.)

Four Reasons Everyone Hates the X-Box One (And Why They're Bullshit)

I feel I should preface this by stating, unequivocally, I am *not* a Microsoft ‘fanboy’. I own both PS3 *and* X-Box 360, and have done so since 2006. I play them both about equally. I find the PS3’s exclusives are superior to the X-Box, but multiplatform games I tend to play on the X-Box because Live is a much better experience than PSN – and I just like the feel of the controller better.

I pre-ordered an X-Box One yesterday. The prevailing sentiment surrounding this revelation seems to be a concern that I’m suffering from some sort of head injury. Indeed, if you’d listen to the Internet right now, there’s no real point in Microsoft even going ahead with the console’s release in November. Sony’s already won. Their E3 conference was nothing more than a pointed assault on the X-Box One itself. Indeed, it was less what the PS4 can do than making fun of the so-called weak points of the X-Box One. It was the definition of negative campaigning – and it worked wonders. Nearly 84% of a recent IGN poll have stated that Sony ‘won’ E3. So, it’s over. RIP, X-Box One. It’s been fun. We’ll always have May 21, right?

But not so fast – the way I see it, there are four main points that most people finger as the biggest failings of the X-Bone (I like that. I think I’ll use it). To be honest, I think this is simply a case of the Internet overreacting (What? That NEVER happens!!!) and, actually, some of these points are more of a strength than a weakness.

4. The X-Box One Kinect Camera is spying on me! I suppose it’s only logical in a post-PRISM world that there’s a certain degree of paranoia regarding the all-seeing eye of Sauron that sits above your TV. Yes, it’s true that the Kinect has a microphone and a camera and that its default setting is to listen even in an idle state (ostensibly so you can turn on your system by voice command), but lest you be too concerned about someone sitting back at Microsoft HQ with a bag of popcorn watching you as you go about your daily life (think Carrie in the first season of Homeland) just remember that the machine’s Kinect settings are ENTIRELY ADJUSTABLE. If the idea of saying, “X-Box main screen turn on! We get signal!” doesn’t particularly interest you (and let’s be honest – the novelty will probably wear off pretty quickly), just go into your settings and either lower the sensitivity or (as I will do), turn it off altogether.

3. The X-Box One’s proprietary DRM doesn’t allow you to play used games. There is no denying this point. Because of the console’s inherent DRM technology, you don’t own a ‘game’ as much as a license to PLAY said game. To many, this seems to be a targeted attack at the used game industry (which – make no mistake – is huge right now. Even big boxes like Best Buy and Wal-Mart are getting into it) because you can’t just walk into your local GameStop and – for the low, low price of $5 off the MSRP - pick up a pre-owned copy of the latest hot title. You know what I have to say to that? Good. The used game industry is *hurting* video games as a whole. The gaming industry is a massive, billion dollar business that’s as big as it’s ever been. Why, then, are we constantly reading about huge layoffs and studios being shuttered? The reason – at least partially – is used games. When you buy a used game off the shelf, not a single penny of that goes to the developers who poured their heart and soul into the very game you’re hoping to enjoy for the next 15 to 20 hours of your life. While it’s not quite tantamount to piracy, it has essentially the same net result on the developer’s bottom line. What’s more – if there were no case for companies to worry about used game sales eating into their profit margin, the overall price for a new game could feasibly come down.

2. I can’t lend my X-Box One games to my friend. Sony’s marketing team had a brilliant little 20 second ad that they showed during their E3 panel that poked fun at the (admittedly convoluted) manner that you can go about lending a copy of your game to a friend on the X-Box. Basically, it involves sending a code to someone on your friend list which then temporarily (for a pre-determined period of time) transfers your license to your friend so they can play the game in your stead. This idea of a ‘digital license transfer’ isn’t exactly new – Ebook readers have been doing it for a couple of years now. But what everybody is so quick to gloss over is that you don’t actually have to lend your friend the *disc* itself. Because you’re just transferring a license, your friend can download a copy of the game onto their own machine and play. Now the idea of lending wonderful, downloadable Arcade games such as Braid or Mark of the Ninja becomes possible. What’s more – suddenly my friend in Winnipeg can ‘borrow’ my copy of Alan Wake, despite living literally halfway across the country. I think that’s pretty cool.

1. The X-Box One needs to be connected to the Internet to work. Let’s ignore for a second the fact that this statement is technically incorrect – it *does* need to connect to Microsoft’s servers once a day in order to authenticate or else the games won’t work, but a constant connection is not required. However, it’s true – an Internet connection is required in order to play your games. And this is a big deal because … why, exactly? Let’s be serious for a second – we’re living in The Future ™ here, people. We live in a connected world where everything from coffee shops to your local fast-food restaurant now boasts free WiFi. Whole cities are turning into giant hot-spots. In addition, a recent Reuters report stated that 53% of all people over the age of 18 own smart phones. Think about that for a moment. More than half of adults currently own a handheld device that fits in their pocket AND IS CONSTANTLY CONNECTED TO THE INTERNET. If a ‘net connection is really that hard to come by, just start up a hot spot using your iPhone and authenticate your games that way. PC gamers using Valve’s Steam system have been dealing with this ‘hardship’ for years – yet most still consider Steam to be the PC’s pre-eminent gaming platform. What’s more – the constant internet connection could actually end up being a boon for the X-Box One down the road. Thanks to cloud computing, over the course of the system’s lifespan, as MS’ cloud servers take more of the load off of your local box, developers will be able to actually stretch the bounds of what the system is capable of. Yes – your system may essentially become MORE POWERFUL over the course of its lifespan, simply by virtue of being connected to the ‘net. … But that’s terrible. Who’d want that?

In closing, Microsoft has never been afraid to drive the bus forward with regards to technological innovation. You may recall in 2002 there was a huge kerfuffle when it was announced that the nascent X-Box Live service was going to be *gasp* … broadband only! Now, 11 years on, can you even imagine anyone gaming over dial-up? The Future ™ is here, but – for the time being, at least – Sony’s new system is only promising more of the same. So that’s why I’m choosing the X-Bone – warts and all – as my preferred launch system.

What I’m Reading: 100 Bullets vol. 12 (Azzarrello / Rizzo)

What I’m Playing: – State of Decay on Xbox, (in three days) Last of Us on PS3.

My Five Favourite Films (2012 Apocalyptic Edition)

It's been a few years since I've done this (apathy and post-holiday food comas prevented me from doing it last year - my first on Blogger), but in what (used) to be an (semi) annual tradition, I would list my five favourite films from the past year. Note: This doesn't mean these aren't the five *best* films I saw in theaters over the year (That is to say they may not be the Battleship Potemkin), but these are the five films that - for whatever reason - engaged me the most over the past calendar year.

So, with that needless disclaimer out of the way, here we go:

5. Wreck-It Ralph - From the moment I spied the first trailers for this Pixar-esque outing from Disney animation about an '80s video game villain (voiced by the indomitable John C. Reilly) who grows tired of being the bad guy, I had a feeling that it was predestined that I would love this film. From the barrage of video game references (though even if you've never picked up a controller in your life, you'll still be able to enjoy it) to the heartfelt and honest script and add in some of the best voicework of recent memory (In particular, I'd like to praise dear, departed Wash himself - Alan Tudyk, as King Candy, the autocratic ruler of the Super Mario Kart-clone, Sugar Rush and Sarah Silverman as Vannelope Von Schweetz, the 'glitch' in the same game) and you've got a modern animated classic that reveres video games without mocking them - a rare feat for the increasingly-cynical Hollywood machine.
Geek Score: 9 out of 10 Bacon Strips

4. The Dark Knight Rises - Probably my most-anticipated film coming in to 2012 (indeed, one of my most-anticipated films, period, since I saw its predecessor eight times in theatres) thankfully did not disappoint. In Christopher Nolan we trust. I was never worried for a second. Tom Hardy's Bane is a suitably imposing villain for Chistian Bale's Batman and - weird pacing issues aside - the Nolan Bat-trilogy comes to a close in spectacular fashion. I've said it before and I'll say it again - the Chris Nolan Batman trilogy ranks as one of the greatest movie trilogies of all-time. Now please, Warner Brothers, no matter how much he may try to convince you, Brett Ratner must *not* direct the next Batman movie. I beg you, for the sake of my sanity.
Geek Score: 9 out of 10 Bacon Strips

3. Skyfall - I wasn't sure what to think heading in to Skyfall. On the one hand, Casino Royale was awesome and Daniel Craig was unquestionably fit to wear 007's fine, tailored suits. But on the other hand, Quantum of Solace was a muddied snoozefest and Sam Mendes was not exactly well-known for directing action movies. As it turns out, my trepidations were completely unnecessary as Mendes provided us with one of the (if not *THE*) best Bond films in the half-century history of the franchise - a ballsy, gritty take that paints Bond as raw - indeed, as human - as he's ever been before. The action sequences are top-notch and Javier Bardem's Silver will go down in the pantheon as one of the best Bond-villains of all-time. Menacing, yet sympathetic, he's truly an electric character and a joy to watch.
Geek Score: 9 out of 10 Bacon Strips

2. The Avengers - You're likely not surprised to see this film on my list, especially given the amount of ink I've given it throughout the year (you may recall in my post where I talked about The Avengers box-office prospects, I extrapolated data that led me to believe the film would end up with $626 million. ... I missed it by 2.5 million. #humblebrag). Marvel's dedication to building a persistent world with their varying franchises was well-served and the film was, truly, everything my inner comic book nerd hoped it would be. It's not dark and twisty like Nolan's Bat-franchise, but it's loud, bombastic, and simply fun to watch. Joss Whedon did a remarkable job and I can't wait for the next one.
Geek Score: 10 out of 10 Bacon Strips (Golden Bacon Award!)

1. Looper - Surprised? To be honest, I am a little bit, too - as I was compiling this list in my head over the past few days, I just assumed that The Avengers would be number 1. Looper would be *on* the list, certainly, but to supplant Whedon's superhero juggernaut? It almost didn't make sense to me. Until, suddenly, it did. Much like this film itself - it's accessible, but at the same time, challenging. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that no other film this past year had me talking about it more - my friends and I debated it ad nauseum. "What did (spoiler) mean?" "Does the ending work for you?" "What manner of time-travel theory does the film most likely ascribe to?" That is the sign of a truly engaging - and deeply-entertaining - film. It's one of the most daring, inventive Sci-Fi films to come out in years and it challenges you to repeated viewings - almost daring you to try and pick it apart. Director Rian Johnson's previous work includes the criminally-underrated Brick (Also recommended - seek it out if you haven't seen it), which takes a Dashiell Hammett murder-mystery and sets it in a modern, 21st-Century high school, so this was something of a departure for him. The bottom line, though is that he spun a masterful story with an intelligent script, highlighted by great acting by Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Bruce Willis. This was my favourite film of 2012.

Geek Score: 10 out of 10 Bacon Strips (Golden Bacon Award!)

- EP